A rant about presentations

My company’s internal conference is in a couple of weeks, so this seems like a good time to have a quick rant about some presentation failings I’ve seen over the last year or so.

If you want to, or are planning to present at a conference (or even just a usergroup), please, please, please pay attention to the following.

Don’t read your presentation

Please don’t read the bullets on your slides one by one. Please also don’t read a speech off your phone. If I wanted to have something read to me, I’d get an audio book.

A presentation should feel dynamic. It is, and should feel like, a live performance.

If you need reminders or cue cards, that’s fine, but put keywords on them, points that need to be discussed, not the entire speech

Watch your font size

This is for the slides but especially for the demos. Font size of 30 is probably the smallest you should be using on slides.

In demos, if I’m sitting in the back row and can’t read the code, there may be a problem. My eyes are not the best though, so that might be a failing on my part. If, however, I’m sitting in the second row and can’t read the code, there’s definitely a problem.

If the conference insists on, or offers time for a tech check, take the opportunity to check your fonts. A tech check isn’t just ‘does my laptop see the projector? Yes, done.’ Walk to the back of the room, go through all the slides, start your demo, walk back to the back of the room. Make sure that everything is clearly visible.

Minimalistic slides

Please don’t put an essay on your slide. Please don’t have fancy animation (unless you’re doing a presentation on animation). Don’t have things that flash, flicker, spin or dance.

It’s distracting, and it probably means your audience is watching your slides and not listening to you. You should be the star of the presentation, not your slides. They’re a support character.


I like the Visual Studio dark theme. It’s nice to code with, it’s absolutely terrible on a projector. Especially if the room is not dark. For projectors you want strong contrast. Dark font on light background usually works. Dark blue on black does not, two similar shades of blue doesn’t.

Check that your demos are visible, check that the code is readable from the back of the room.

Learn how to zoom in, whether with the windows built in tools or installed apps. Use the zoom any time that what you’re showing may not be clear.

Repeat the question

Especially if the session is being recorded. Your voice is being recorded, the audience isn’t. It is so frustrating to listen to a recorded session, hear a minute of silence followed by the presenter giving a single word answer.

Even if the session is not being recorded, acoustics often make it possible for the presenter to hear a question while part of the audience hasn’t.

It also gives you a chance to confirm that you heard the question correctly and gives you a few moments to think on an answer.

Pass Summit 2016 abstract reviews

Following on Steve’s blog post on summit abstracts, I decided to publish mine.

My comments are not intended as an attack on the program committee, it’s an incredibly hard job that you couldn’t pay me to do (I’ve done similar work before and hated it). What I hope comes out of this, and the other posts which Steve reviewed, are that comments are more constructive and can be used to improve the abstract.

When the initial mails were sent out, I had one general session and one lightning talk accepted. Since then, I’ve been asked to also present one of the sessions that was listed as alternate.

So, without any editing, the abstracts and comments:

All about Indexes (half-day, level 300, declined)

Indexes are essential to good database performance, but it can be hard to decide what indexes to create and the 'rules' around indexes often appear to be vague or downright contradictory.

In this session we'll dive deep into indexes, have a look at their architecture and internal structure and how that affects the way that indexes are used in query execution. We’ll look at why clustered indexes are recommended on almost all tables and how their architecture affects the choice of columns. We’ll look at nonclustered indexes; their architecture and how query design affects what indexes should be created to support various queries.


Abstract starts off really well, but last sentence has some structure/repetition issues. Level might be appropriate, but I wonder if in a 3 hour session you can cover enough detail to justify a 300 level.

Nice abstract and overall flow between title, abstract and goals.

Abstract seems well written and gives decent insight into session contents. It would be better to mention 2014 & 2016 features to make the session more attractive. The topic of indexes is somewhat overdone and may have some difficulty attracting attendees. Goals are decent but somewhat generic and could benefit from being more tangible. 25% demo on this topic seems a bit low to keep attendees engaged for a 3 hour session.

Need more meat in abstract. Are you going to talk about column, filtered or other index types? Only 25% demos, you have 3 hours???

Could cover more breadth in 3 hours. Filtered, sparse, columnstore etc.

I don’t see this for a half-day session. The goal are just too weak. And only 25% demo’s? You mean you are going to be talking for 3 hours and demoing for an hour? zzzzz. Need to flesh this abstract out a lot more.

Subjective: For a 3h long session, even at lvl300 , would expect a bit more demos to keep the attendees from nodding off…

Interesting combination. One wonders if I can cover enough material in 3 hours to make it a level 300 and others imply that there’s not enough material to spend 3 hours on.

Thing is, I’ve given this presentation twice before, as a 3 hour session. Pass Summit in Charlotte and SQLBits in London. It fits into 3 hours, providing there aren’t too many questions, that is. If I was going to add clustered and nonclustered columnstores and Hekaton’s range and hash indexes (and the interactions between them, eg non-clustered rowstore index on a clustered columnstore), then it would be a full day precon at least.

There are no 2014 or 2016 features mentioned, because the rowstore indexes didn’t change much in either version. Sure, I could call out the increased key size, but that’s not exactly abstract material. Maybe a footnote on one slide.

As for the topic being overdone and will have difficulty attracting attendees, there are only two sessions on rowstore indexes this year, a precon (Kendra Little) and a 100-level general session (Kathi Kellenberger), plus a few internals presentations and performance-related presentations that include indexing. Every time I’ve given an indexing presentation at a SQLSaturday, Pass Summit or SQLBits I’ve had a packed room. Sure, it isn’t shiny and new, but it’s probably relevant to most systems we design, develop and administer.

“You mean you are going to be talking for 3 hours and demoing for an hour? “ <snark_mode = on> No, I planned to do the middle hour as a mime act. </snark_mode>

Last time I checked, a 3 hour session meant talking for 3 hours. I’m sorry that indexing sounds so dry and boring that attendees are sure to fall asleep during it. I haven’t yet had anyone falling asleep in my indexing sessions. Maybe everyone who did, did so quietly and I didn’t notice. Maybe I should bring fireworks next time.

Go, Go, Query Store! (general session, level 200, accepted)

One of the hardest things to do in SQL is to identify the cause of a sudden degradation in performance. The DMVs don’t persist information over a restart of the instance and, unless there was already some query benchmarking (and there almost never is), answering the question of how the queries behaved last week needs a time machine. Up until now, that is. The addition of the Query Store to SQL Server 2016 makes identifying and resolving performance regressions a breeze.

In this session we’ll take a look at what the Query Store is and how it works, before diving into a scenario where overall performance suddenly degraded, and we’ll see why Query Store is the best new feature in SQL Server 2016, bar none.


Topic: Great topic. SQL Server 2016 and new shiny features like QS will definitely draw a crowd.
Abstract: Very well written with clear supportive goals.
Subjective: This sounds like a great session I would like to attend. The one issue I have is that it is listed as only 25% demo. Demos are the best way to who off QS functionality. 50% demo would be better.

I would like to attend this session

The outline seems to clearly describe the contents of the presentation. The topic and goals should be compelling to attendees. The target audience should be big enough to support this session. There appears to be a reasonable amount of live demonstrations in relation to the topic being presented.

Abstract: detailed, clear
topic: relevant and new, one of the more interesting feature of sql server 2016
Subjective rating: a good session

Abstract: well written, good topic
Topic: good topic, eye catching
Subjective: good session, would be interested in this

Nothing much to say here. The session will likely be closer to 50% demos, the original plan was 25%, but when I built the slides for SQL Saturday Iceland, I ended up putting more demos in and less slides.

Is that a parameter I smell? (general session, level 300, declined)

All too often a forum post on erratic query performance is met with a reply &quot;Oh, it&#39;s parameter sniffing. You can fix it with &lt;insert random solution here&gt;.&quot; The problem with answer, even if it has identified the cause, is that it’s only part true. Parameter sniffing is not simply a problem that needs fixing; it&#39;s an essential part of well-performing queries. In most cases.

Come to this session to learn what Parameter Sniffing really is and why it’s a good thing, most of the time. Learn how to identify the scenarios where it’s not good, why a feature that is supposed to improve query performance sometimes degrades it, and what your options are for resolving the problems when they do occur.


Abstract: Well presented, explains purpose of session.
Topic: catchy title, still timely and relevant.
Subjective: Nice mix of demo for this topic.

title not cute, if someone does not know about this they would not come Good abstract and good goals

Abstract: Grammar is a bit rough making the abstract difficult to read.

topic is decent . while it not “latest” or “hot”, it address a real life problem that developers can face. Abstract is a bit too generic and could benefit from more tangible details. Goals are okay but somewhat generic. demo % is decent.

Thanks for submitting a session that covers a really hot button topic in database queries! Looking forward to seeing it.

Again, fair enough, nothing much I can say about these comments.

On Transactions and Atomic Operations (general session, level 200, declined)

If there’s one thing that we, as SQL developers, do, it&#39;s not use enough transactions.

Transactions are critical when multiple changes need to be made entirely or not at all, but even given that it’s rare to see transactions used at all in most production code

In this session, we&#39;ll look at what transactions are and why we should use them. We&#39;ll explore the effects transactions have on locking and the transaction log. We&#39;ll investigate methods of handling errors and undoing data modifications, and we&#39;ll see why nested transactions are a lie.


Abstract: Grammar in first sentence is difficult to read. Too many commas.

good topic, need more meat in abstract and goals.

topic may not be “latest” but its a foundation subject and of relevance to most database developers. abstract clearly conveys what to expect from the session. goals are somewhat terse and could benefit from tangible details. demo % is a bit low.

Atomic Operations is in the title, but not used/defined in the abstract itself.

Abstract: Second sentence is a bit run-on and incoherent.
Topic: Fit for purpose, but likely a bit niche, as the author already seems to fears.
Subjective: Would have expected at least 50% demo – after all the easiest way to understand the need for TRANS is to see data buggered up by colliding updates.

Yes, I do have a tendency to torture my commas (they always confess at the end) and play with grammar. I will try to remember next year to write with simple, plain grammar. I do need to flesh this out a bit for next time it’s submitted anywhere.

I’m not sure what in the abstract conveys my fear that it’s a niche session, I don’t think it is. From working on various clients’ production systems over the last few years, I very seldom see explicit transactions. It’s something we don’t do enough, not a niche topic.

I’m also not sure that the reviewer meant by ‘colliding updates’. Updates, like all statements, are always part of a transaction, even if it is just one automatically started and committed. If two sessions were to try and update the same column, same rows at the same time to different values, the outcome will be as if one or the other had run, not a mixture of the two. And wrapping the update in an explicit transaction won’t change that behaviour

The Many Latencies of TempDB (general session, level 400, originally alternate, later accepted)

TempDB gets a bad rap when it comes to performance and scalability, and it’s all-too-often well deserved. A badly configured TempDB can have devastating effects on throughput. Combine that with poor queries and, well, you didn’t have any plans for the weekend, right?

In this session we’ll look at some common causes of TempDB contention, both query-based and configuration-based. We’ll look at guidelines for configuring TempDB and when and why you’d make various changes, and we’ll cover more ways to monitor TempDB than you can shake a stick at.

Now, about those weekend plans…


Abstract: Clear and well written abstract. No prerequisite listed.
Topic: Topic and goals seem like they would be appealing to attendees.
Subjective: Sounds like a good session that people would benefit from.

Abstract: interesting
Topic: relevant
Subjecttive rating: compelling, high level

Abstract: The outline and details of this abstract are well written
Topic: This is a good topic
Subjective: I may attend this session

The session prerequisites are helpful. A great topic and the Abstract is almost good. It is funny but not enough information about the session.

Session prerequisites: TBC?
Goal 1: Correct the “&#39;”
Objective: I would like to attend this session.

The pre-reqs here were a mistake on my part. Despite checking and re-checking the abstracts, that mistake slipped through (tbc = to be completed).

I would love to have corrected the “&#39;”, as well as the &quot; and &gt; that appeared scattered through the abstracts, but they appeared on submit and editing afterwards didn’t help. Something, somewhere in the website messed up the HTML encoding a bit.

Watch a query run. Run, query, run! (Lightning talk, level 100, declined)

Previously if you wanted to get any run-time statistics for a query, you had to include the actual execution plan and run the query to completion. No more! New in SQL 2016 is the live query statistics that let you watch the execution of a query, in real time, and see when the operators run and where the data flows.

In this lightning talk we’ll look at how the live query statistics works and discuss some scenarios where this will really help debugging strange query behaviour.


Perfect topic/abstract for Lightning Talk, sign me up!

interesting and current topic. well written abstract with good details of session contents. Goals are terse but clear.

Sounds like a good topic for a Lightning Talk.

Great topic and good intro to query store. Hopefully this talk will provide concise knowledge.
Topic is good, will interest a large amount of attendess.
Level is excellent – it’s a new feature so 100 level is great. I would have liked to see mention of query store in the title.

good topic

New topic on new technology. Small enough to be interesting

Interesting and great topic. Abstract and Goals talks to each other. New features is always a good place to grab peoples attention.

The comment on wanting query store to appear in the title is mystifying, because this session has nothing to do with query store. It’s showing off the Live Query Statistics (which, while nice, is too small to warrant anything more than a lightning session alone)

Why Temporal Tables and Stretch Database Are Best Friends (Lightning talk, level 200, accepted)

SQL Server 2016 introduced, among several other new features, Temporal tables and Stretch database.

From a distance, they appear not to have much to do with each other. Temporal tables allow you to query the table as it was at a point in time. Stretch allows for tables to span the earthed SQL Server and the cloud.

In this short session we’ll look at why these two features work spectacularly well together and why a stretched temporal table makes perfect sense.


Clear understanding of the objective, and as a “new” feature people will drawn to this.

Perfect Lightning Talk abstract, focused topic and something new with the latest version of SQL Server.

Sounds interesting!

interesting topic – new and relevant. Abstract is brief but gives good insight into session contents. Goals are terse, but clear and tangible. No demos may be off-putting to some attendees.

Earthed SQL is an interesting expression and certainly made me think.
There’s two new features here – is that too much for a 10 minute lightening talk?
If good connection is made early between the two then this could be good
Three goals seem to sum up the presentation well.

Try just one topic in 10 minutes or create a 75 or 3 hour session on new features of 2016

No real “pull” for a short session.

“No demos may be off-putting”. Um, what? This is a 10-minute lightning talk, I’m not demoing features in 10 minutes and I’d be very surprised if attendees expected demos in a 10 minute session.

I can’t take credit for the “Earthed SQL” expression, that one’s from Rimma’s Keynote presentation in 2014

Upcoming conferences

It’s shaping up to a busy year for conferences, well busy by my standards that is. While I’m unfortunately missing SQLBits, I’ll still be getting a chance to enjoy an English summer.


The InsideSQL conference is a new conference organised by Neil Hambly. It’s a deep-dive conference, with longer sessions than many conferences offer, and an opportunity to dig deep into topics.

I’m presenting two sessions there, first a look at SQL waits, why there are waits and what various waits types mean, second a nice deep discussion on SQL Server indexes.

SQLSaturday Iceland

Iceland has been on my to-visit list for some time, so a SQLSaturday there? Perfect excuse for a short visit and a bit of exploration. I wonder if there’s any chance I’ll get to see the Aurora Borealis.

I’m doing a full-day precon on the Thursday (Friday is an Icelandic public holiday) on execution plans, as well as a regular session on Query Store on the Saturday.

South African SQLSaturdays

Fast forward to September, the South African SQL Saturdays are again running on back-to-back weekends. Johannesburg on the 3rd of September, Cape Town on the 10th and Durban planned for the 17th.

We’d love to have more international speakers join us for these. The local weather is lovely in September, and the exchange rate to the dollar/pound so poor that you won’t believe how cheap things are here. Come down for a two week African holiday, and get three SQLSaturday presentations in on the side.

Pass Summit 2015

It’s two weeks until Pass Summit 2015!

It feels a little weird this year, it’s the first year in quite some time where I’m not presenting in Seattle. The reason for that’s pretty simple, I didn’t submit any abstracts. It still feels strange to be going as an attendee, to be able to pick and chose sessions as I like, rather than having to work around the slots that I have to speak in, and to be able to spend time just wandering around the conference rather than rushing from place to place as is usual.

Still, that gives me a good opportunity to attend sessions I’m interested in. Looking over the schedule, my 5 must-attend sessions are (in no particular order)

Plus the keynote with Dr DeWitt and Dr Nehme is an event not to be missed!

Of course, there aren’t just the sessions. There’s the Birds of a Feather lunch, the Women in IT lunch, the SQL Clinic and the CAT team to ask difficult questions of, and the hundreds and thousands of ad-hoc conversations in the corridors, many of which may be more interesting than the sessions themselves. Not to mention the multitude of parties and events in the evenings.

Oh, and there will be Crazy Hat day as well. For those who don’t know what I’m taking about, it’s Argenis Without Borders, version 2. Please donate if you can, I really want to see Argenis dancing to music from a trombone.

All about Execution Plans

Coming to the PASS Summit in October this year? Excellent!

I say excellent, because Grant (blog|twitter) and I are presenting a full-day seminar on the Monday, all about execution plans. Excited already? If not, let me give you a taste of what we’ll be discussing.

Grant will be kicking things off with a look at how the optimiser works. Not 500 level deep internals (that’d take all day by itself), but an overview of how the optimiser turns this

SELECT t.Title, u.UserName, u.UserLevel, t.LastModified, t.LastPoster
FROM Threads t
INNER JOIN Posts p on t.ThreadID = p.ThreadID
INNER JOIN Users u on p.Poster = u.UserID
WHERE t.ThreadID = 42

into this


as well as some DMVs that give a view on what the optimiser is doing.

After that, I’ll be digging into what the plan cache is, how it’s structured and how plans are matched to incoming queries. I’ll also cover how you might go about monitoring SQL’s usage of the cache.

After that we’ll discuss the myriad and varied ways to get execution plans out of SQL and what the various different options for that return and what some of the terms involved really mean (estimated execution plans anyone?).

Once all that’s out there (which will probably take the entire morning) it’ll be onto the fun of reading the execution plans, what those various icons represent and what all their arcane properties are telling you. Maybe, just maybe we’ll also have a look at the raw XML form of the plan, just for fun.

And because theory’s not very useful without something to apply it to, we’ll be ending off the day by seeing how you can use the information from the execution plan to tune your queries. After all, everyone wants better performance, right?

Still not completely convinced? Then check out the 24 hours of PASS coming in September. Both Grant and I are doing a pre-con preview. I’m doing extracting execution plans and Grant’s doing a portion of the reading execution plans section.

Right, now that everyone’s dying to attend this, I’m going to toss out a little bit of a challenge. If you’re coming to our precon and you have an execution plan that you don’t understand (maybe a strange operator, maybe a property with a value you’ve never seen), mail it to me (gail@<blog domain>) with a note as to what you want clarifying and we might discuss it during the pre-con. Some rules, just to keep things sane

  • No confidential stuff. I don’t want legal trouble, neither do you.
  • If the exec plan takes 5 minutes to open in SSMS, I’m deleting it.
  • If it’s multiple pages in SSMS, I’m deleting it.
  • I don’t promise to look at anyone’s plans, it depends how we’re doing on time.

PASS Summit Session Votes

I blogged a week ago about the sessions that I submitted for the PASS Summit this year. At the point that I scheduled the post I hadn’t seen the announcement from PASS, hence a second post on the same topic.

This year, you can vote for sessions that you want to see. How much influence this will have over the Program Committee isn’t defined anywhere, but anything is better than nothing.

Voting closes on the 20th May (Friday), so if you have any interest in what gets presented at PASS Summit this year, go over to the speaker preference survey and vote.

Oh, and to make things easier, if you want to vote for any of my sessions, they’re here

Pass summit abstracts

I missed the Pass summit last November for a number of reasons, but I’m hoping I can attend this year. Given that, I submitted a number of abstracts for consideration.

The limits on number were as follows: Up to 4 abstracts for regular, spotlight or half-day sessions (ie main conference sessions) plus, providing some requirements are met, up to 2 abstracts for pre-con sessions.

I submitted five abstracts, four were ones I’ve been thinking about for some time, the last was a last minute surprise.

Bad plan! Sit!

Bad execution plans are the bane of database performance everywhere they crop up. But what is a bad execution plan? How do you identify one in your system and, once identified how do you go about fixing it?

In this top-rated session from the 24 Hours of PASS we’ll look at some things that make a plan ‘bad’, how you might detect such plans and various methods of fixing the problem, both immediately and long-term.

I wasn’t planning on submitting this one to be honest. It’s one I did for the 24 hours of Pass back in February, and I didn’t think it appropriate to redo at the Summit the same year. Some people at Pass disagreed with me on that. The session was one of the top 3 from 24 hours of Pass and as such got a guaranteed slot at Pass summit, and a chance for a Spotlight slot.

Is that a parameter I smell?

All too often a forum post on erratic query performance is met with a reply ‘Oh, it’s parameter sniffing. You can fix it with .’ The problem with that answer, even if it has identified the cause, is that it’s only part true. Parameter sniffing is not simply a problem that needs fixing, it’s an essential part of well-performing queries. In most cases.

Come to this session to learn what Parameter Sniffing really is and why it’s a good thing, most of the time. Learn how to identify the scenarios where it’s not good, why a feature that is supposed to improve query performance sometimes degrades it, and what your options are for resolving the problems when they do occur.

Performance improvements in 60 min or less. Guaranteed

The system is slow, users cry
It’s impacting our bottom line
In meetings the curses fly
The situation is far from fine

While up on the IT floor
The DBA tears his hair
He’ll soon be shown the door
If he cannot the performance repair,

It often seems, from looking at forum posts and client requests, that the steady-state of databases is ‘too slow’ and all too often the people who are tasked with resolving performance problems are overwhelmed by the shear scope of the problem, and aren’t really sure where to start.

In this demo-heavy session, we’ll look at a fictional company’s database and website and work through finding the worst offenders in terms of poor performance, identifying the causes of the problems and at least starting to get the queries to perform better and the users to stop phoning and complaining.

Yes, part of the abstract is written in verse. It’s something I was threatening to do since last year, and I decided that it shouldn’t harm my chances, much.

Dos and don’ts of database corruption

Database corruption is one of the worst things you can encounter as a DBA. It can result in downtime, data loss, and unhappy users. What’s scary about corruption is that it can strike out of the blue and with no warning. If maintenance is not being done regularly on the database it’s easy for corruption to go unnoticed until it’s too late to repair without losing data.
In this session we’ll look at

  • Easy maintenance operations you should be running right now to ensure the fastest possible identification and resolution of corruption
  • Best practices for handling a database that you suspect may be corrupted
  • Common actions that can worsen the problem.
  • Appropriate steps to take and methods of recovery

I did this session initially for Quest, for their Pain of the Week webcast back in February. I enjoyed doing it a lot, and it got some good feedback, so I decided to submit it for Summit as a contrast to my usual performance-related presentations.

All about Execution Plans

Last, but far from least…

Grant Fritchey (blog | twitter) and I submitted a join pre-con session on execution plans. This is an area Grant is a well-known expert on, having written a book on it, and we’re hoping that we’ll be given the chance to devote a full day to this topic.

The key to understanding how SQL Server is processing your queries is the execution plan.

This full day session focuses on the execution plan. We will start right at the beginning and talk about the compile process. We’ll also go over how, and more importantly, why, plans are stored in cache and how they are removed.

We’ll spend time exploring the key differences between actual and estimated plans, and why those descriptions are more than a little misleading. We’ll also show you assorted methods to obtain a query’s execution plan and what the differences and tradeoffs of each are.

A full day class on execution plans would not be complete without spending time learning to reading them. You’ll learn where to find useful information in execution plans, what the common operators are and how to decipher the sometimes cryptic messages the plans are sending to you. We’ll also debunk some myths surrounding query operators and execution plans.

All of this is meant to further your understanding of how queries work in order to improve the queries you’re responsible for. With this in mind, we’ll show how you can use execution plans to tune queries. All of the information presented will be taken from real world examples. We’ll build on the information through the day so that at the end, after following us through multiple examples at your own computer, you’ll have a stronger understanding of how to read, interpret and actually use execution plans in your day-to-day job.

SQL Pass session evaluations

I finally got the last of my PASS Summit session evals and so, like some other people, I thought I’d make them public.

Lies, damned lies and statistics (DBA-388-S)

This session went very well. I was comfortable with the material, it’s a topic I really like and in general it felt, to me at least, like a good session. The ratings seem to agree with that.

Very Poor Poor Average Good Excellent
How would you rate the usefulness of the session information in your day-to-day environment? 1 7 36
How would you rate the Speaker’s presentation skills? 3 5 36
How would you rate the Speaker’s knowledge of the subject? 4 40
How would you rate the accuracy of the session title, description, and experience level to the actual session? 5 39
How would you rate the amount of time allocated to cover the topic/session? 11 33
How would you rate the quality of the presentation materials? 1 7 36

If I make Very Poor = 1 and Excellent = 5 then, averaging all the scores over all the questions, overall that session rated at 4.82/5

Not bad at all.

Edit: The overall PASS Summit session ratings are out and this session came in at 7th overall (all sessions including pre/post cons, all tracks) and 5th in the DBA track, behind only Buck Woody, Kimberly Tripp and Paul Randal I am extremely surprised to have come in that high at a conference like the PASS Summit.

Insight into Indexes (DBA-315)

This session was a whole different story. It did not go well at all, and I didn’t need the ratings to tell me that.

I wasn’t overly comfortable with the material. This is not to say that I didn’t know it, I did, but I wasn’t comfortable with it. In retrospect, I should have scrapped the entire presentation and done it over from scratch in a different way, even if that meant doing it the night before. Lesson learnt there.

To add to that, I broke my own rules for presentations. Usually I’m at the session room at least 5 minutes before the previous session finishes, with my laptop booted, the presentation loaded, management studio (and profiler if necessary) open and any pre-demo scripts already run. That way, as soon as the speaker who’s presenting in the session before mine finishes, I can get on stage, plug the laptop in, get the projector online and then relax.

In this case, I was late. The previous speaker had already left and my laptop was still switched off. Hence I rushed to get everything loaded and ready, and Windows, sensing the urgency, promptly crashed hard.

Cue 2 minutes of frantically trying to reboot laptop (it was ignoring all shut down requests) and load presentation onto the desktop in case my laptop didn’t reboot. All while the AV guy’s trying to get the audio on and the recording started.

Let’s just say it went downhill from there.

So, ratings for that one.

Very poor Poor Average Good Excellent
How would you rate the usefulness of the session information in your day-to-day environment? 2 1 7 23 51
How would you rate the Speaker’s presentation skills? 5 29 50
How would you rate the Speaker’s knowledge of the subject? 1 11 72
How would you rate the accuracy of the session title, description, and experience level to the actual session? 1 4 31 48
How would you rate the amount of time allocated to cover the topic/session? 6 31 47
How would you rate the quality of the presentation materials? 4 33 47

If I do the same averaging as for the first one, that comes out at 4.55. Not the worst I’ve ever had, though not by much. Lessons learnt.

PASS Day 3 and post-con

Once the pre-con was done I dropped into the SQLCAT sessions on consolidation and virtualisation. Late, because I was cleaning up at the blogger’s table (Adam wasn’t there that day). Interesting session, the best-practices were worth noting down and their graphs on performance were encouraging.

After lunch I was intending to go to Allen’s clustering session, but it was over my head, so I switched to Buck’s SQL manageability presentation

Buck Woody’s session is a laugh-riot. Anyone he knows within view gets picked on. and various groups are getting insulted. Insulted in that session

  • Me
  • British people
  • South Africans
  • Developers
  • U2 fans
  • Baptists
  • Microsoft
  • Elderly people

All in good humour, no serious insult intended.

I missed the next session, chatted with Brent Ozar. Last of the day was my session on statistics. Audience was a little tired, but the session went quite well. I asked about table sizes and someone claimed a 100 billion row table. I really do want to know what kind of data they’re storing that generates a table that size.

The post-con day was quiet, in comparison with the days before. I split time between a post-con on semi-structured and unstructured data and some insider sessions. Some cool stuff under discussion in the insider sessions and lots of good debate. The post-con was useful, the part on full-text the most. It’s not something I’ve played much with in the past.

That’s PASS over and done for another year. Same time, same place, next year.